Sometimes, it feels like situations compound upon themselves.
Those who experience good fortune continue to have more of it. Others just can’t stay away from bad circumstances. It’s as if we’re stuck in an endless cycle, where our actions and their consequences further perpetuate the situation that we’re in.
One of the most alarming examples of this concerns social mobility, or the lack of it.
What’s in a name?
October evokes images of colorful leaves, dropping temperatures, and pumpkin spice lattes. But it’s also the perfect time to catch up on books that might have been too heavy for the summer.
Since Halloween is the biggest event of October, the question that comes to mind is: What does the word “scary” mean to you?
While we quickly think of ghouls, zombies, and vampires, scary can reach far beyond characters found in horror films. Maybe scary means being taken away from everything you know, or continuing on a path you don’t want to go down. Maybe scary is getting a visit from your landlady.
Reading is dead.
The nature of books has evolved. Society and technology have changed. Forcibly, our approach to reading has taken on new forms to accommodate a different way of life.
The question is: For better or worse?
Previously, I talked about the science behind reading books versus watching television, and how each medium affects our brains in various ways. Although books give us new ideas, spark discussions, and explore topics in detail, the same information can be delivered in a variety of formats. When it comes to exactly how we should absorbing books, the debate rages on.
Let’s take a look.
At only four years old, Yeou-Cheng Ma exhibited a clear talent for the violin.
Under the tutelage of her father, a Ph.D. student at the Paris Conservatory of Music, Yeou-Cheng began to play the instrument at two-and-a-half years old. Only a year later, she entered in her first competition against students ranging from fourteen to nineteen years old. She won.
Her violin teacher praised Yeou-Cheng’s ability to her mother, a vocal student who later sang opera. She said, “Your daughter is a brilliant musician. There’s no doubt in my mind that she inherits this talent from you and your husband…It’s in her genes.”
Finally, the teacher added: “Mrs. Ma, what I’m trying to tell you is that I think it is a great pity that you don’t plan on having another child.”
At the time, the three of them lived in a tiny apartment in Paris. They struggled to earn a living and had barely enough for themselves. Yet, four years after the birth of their daughter, a son was born in 1955. He was named Yo-Yo Ma.
“Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark in the hopeless swamps of the not-quite, the not-yet, and the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish in lonely frustration for the life you deserved and have never been able to reach. The world you desire can be won. It exists.. it is real.. it is possible.. it’s yours.” – Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged
In the beginning, there is always a spark. All endeavors start off fresh, exciting, and full of possibilities. Unfortunately, sparks vanish just as quickly as they are ignited.
Rejection discourages attempts at anything new. Criticism keeps us from stepping out of convention. Inner fears kill any creativity we might have had.
The good news is that, with care and focus, we can learn to create again. By practicing and developing our sense of spirit, we can step outside the bounds set by both ourselves and others. By incorporating various practices, we can rediscover concepts and ideas.
Picture this: You’ve just finished working your busiest time of the year. For all your efforts, you receive a nice paycheck.
To reward yourself, you look for places to spend your hard-earned money. What would you choose out of these options?
All of these questions point towards how we should spend our money. Should we spend it on material objects that will likely bring enjoyment, or on new experiences that have uncertain outcomes?
When faced with this decision, choose the experience. Here’s why.
When it comes to boosting people’s confidence, we hear the same pieces of advice all the time:
The problem with these phrases is that they assume people can simply build up courage on their own to achieve their goals. It makes us think that if we just put in the effort and try hard enough, we can become confident.
A lot of the times, we can’t.
We’re always told by other people to think positive. The key to success is life is to believe, because once you do, you can achieve your goals. Anything is possible when you rely on the power of positive thinking.
At least, that’s what they say.
But experience shows that that’s not necessarily the case.
A few friends I knew wanted to partner up and start an advertising business. People supported their idea and doled out encouraging advice.
In usual fashion, the partners reveled in the high of embarking on a new venture. They talked excitedly about the possibilities their new business would bring. Together, they spent evenings discussing how to set up the business.
First, they set up a corporation and decided on a tax structure. Then, they looked up a few potential customers and brainstormed what kind of help they could offer. Business was going to be big.
It’s easy to see why people lie to others: to keep their jobs, to avoid an argument with someone, to protect their reputation, or because they think everyone will be better off for it. It’s wrong, we know, but sometimes we figure that doing so is the best option in a sea of bad choices.
Lying to ourselves, though? It happens quite often, and as it turns out, we’re pretty good at it. We convince ourselves that we really need that new gadget, that we made a wise financial choice, or everything is fine (when it isn’t). Even if the evidence proves otherwise, we stick to our guns and refuse to back down.
More often than not, the lies we tell ourselves are harmful to our well-being and can be more damaging than we realize. So why do we do it?
This is part two of the Gut Instinct series. To read part one on gut instincts and people, click here.
Imagine you’re at a casino. Your palms are sweating as you hold a pair of dice in your hand. A crowd forms around the table and watches intently. This is it.
“I have a good feeling about this.”
You shake the dice loosely in your hand, hoping you’ll get lucky. Your fingers let go and the dice fly across the table. As the dice land on the board, you take one look and groan.
Regret begins to sink in.
Have you ever listened to that gut feeling you had, only for it to lead you astray? Sure, there were those times when you turned out to be right, but there are those other moments when things didn’t pan out the way you thought they would.
If Napoleon himself fell into that trap at Russia, what chance is there for the rest of us?